scareykatt's poems

Threatening Poem

1991-02-26T14:15:00.000-08:00

by Kazz Falcon

Man, I really hate the other students
They kept on bullying me
The teacher don't do a thing about them
She believed they were just playing around
Yeah, right!
I can't take it any more
The next best thing was the poem
I was expressing my feelings
"For I can be the next kid to bring guns to kill the students"
That was how I felt at that time
I gave the poem to a fellow student
She notified the teacher
I was arrested the next day
I was expelled from school
I served 100 days in juvenile hall
Everyone made a big deal about it
I was reaching out with the threatening poem

Another Lifetime

1991-02-25T14:11:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I went back to the past
Things were quite different
Back then, I was homeless
I managed to survive the street
I had my own place in Hollywood
I grown a lot since then
I became a better person - physically and mentally
Life couldn't be any better
I was proud I accomplished many things
I couldn't make it without the shelter's help
I won't forget the experience
It's hard not to
The shelter came at a much needed time
I was grateful to have the shelter
I continued on the right path
I wasn't the same person
I won't mess up ever again
Or I will not depend on someone's help
I have to make it on my own
I felt so good to succeed
Sometimes, we need to go back to the past
We won't forget our roots
After all, it was another lifetime

Denied Alcoholic

1991-02-24T13:56:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Say it with me
I don’t have a drinking problem
Say it again
I don’t have a drinking problem
Once more
I don’t have a drinking problem
Yes, some friends believed I had one
What do they really know about me?
My life was perfect in every way
I had a wonderful boss, beautiful place and cool friends
I was so freaking happy with my life
I don’t have any problems at all
I paid my rent and bills on time
I was never late at my job
Still, they can’t get it out of their minds
I was able to hold onto everything
My life was under control
Come on now
I don’t have a drinking problem
Say it
Yes, I partied at the clubs every weekend
I was a social drinker

Things Never Change

1991-02-23T13:58:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I dated my ex boyfriend
Things have never been so much better
We started to fall back in love
He remembered my favorite food
We had so much fun dating
We got to know each other again
We meant so much to each other
It was good to be in each other’s lifes again
Life was fabulous with him
We took things very slowly
Last time, we went too fast
Something happened
He showed up drunk at my place
I don’t believed it
He hasn’t stop drinking
He was still working as a bartender
I gave him another chance at love
He just walked all over me
He claimed he didn’t have a drinking problem
He was happy with me
Yet, I wasn’t happy with him
I can’t do this again
I just can’t
It was hard the first time
It nearly destroy my life
His drinking reopened old wounds
I still felt the knife in my heart
It cut deeper into my soul
I cried out loud in pain
I wished I hadn’t went back to him
Things never change

Reunited With The Ex

1991-02-22T14:00:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I ran into my ex the other day
We haven’t seen each other since last year
Things got in the way of the relationship
We didn’t parted on good terms
We caught up with each other
He straightened out his life
He was sorry for the pain he caused me
I was happy he went to rehab
He wanted another chance with me
I didn’t think it was a good ideal
I moved on with my life
We were so different from each other
We grown apart too
He was attraction to me as much I was to him
He mentioned our break up was his wake up call
It changed his life
He has new outlook on life too
He couldn’t do it without me in his life
I thought about another relationship with him
We both had enough time to heal
We went our separate ways
We rebuilt our lifes
We were happier with our lifes
Yet, we found each other again
Could it work for the second time?
Should we give it a try?
Would we drift apart again?
Only time would tell
We will take things slowly
We will remain at our own apartments
I was reunited with the ex

Innocence Victims

1991-02-21T14:02:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I came into the life of crime
It wasn’t a life I want for myself
It just happened
It was forced on me
I couldn’t do a thing about it
I threatened by my friend
Damn, it was out of control
I was in too deep
I couldn’t get enough sleep
I saw the fear in her eyes
I wanted to help her anyway I can
There weren’t any phones at my place
He knew I would call the police
We were somewhere in the country
No one would have a chance to find her
I promised her that I would protect her from him
We need to find a way out of the mess
She trusted me and has faith in me
I didn’t mean any harm to her
It was never my ideal
My friend and I were talking one night
We wondered how we could get fast money
One thing led to the next
We were pretty drunk that night
Weeks later, he brought home a little girl
He claimed she was his niece
It didn’t strike me as odd
The girl was acting strangely
He mentioned it was being in a new place
I could relate to her
She doesn’t how to react around with strangers
Few days later, I read the newspaper
There was an article about a missing girl
She fitted the girl’s description to the tee
I confronted him with the truth
He admitted it was the same girl
Damn, I don’t believe he could do such a thing
I wanted to take her home in the car
She needs to be home with her family
He grabbed the keys from my hand
He mentioned I was in deep as he was
He would turn on me if I tell the police
It was his story against mine
He ruined my life in the mess
I just wanted to do the right thing
I had no choice in the matter
I didn’t want to end up in jail
The girl and I were the innocence victims

Another Chance

1991-02-20T13:42:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I made a drastic mistake
I slept with another man
I was drunk at the club
This guy took me home with him
I went home in the morning
My boyfriend wondered where I was
I wasn’t a good lair
He saw I had the same clothes on
I was being upfront about last night
He had a hard time with it
We were in a monogamous relationship
We didn’t fool around with the men
We were committed to our love
I did a stupid thing
I wasn’t proud of the fling
I was happy with him
I didn’t meant it to happen
It just happened
He wasn’t please with me
I begged for his forgiveness
I didn’t want anyone else, but him
I destroyed our relationship
He broke up with me
I pleaded with him for another chance

Here I Sat

1991-02-19T13:24:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Here I sat in my chair
I pondered what to do
Nothing seems interesting to me
Something that couldn’t grab my attention
Anything wouldn’t give me sparks
Here I sat in front of the computer
I was about to give up the search
The jobs wasn’t there for me
I went to all the employment sites
So far, I came up empty handed
Here I sat with the newspaper
I circled all the job leads I want
I called them up on the phone
There were either taken or faraway from me
I was bored with looking for a job
Here I sat stared into space
I can’t go on like this
I had a bad feeling
I need to find a job soon
I was running out of time
Here I sat crying
I pleaded with God
I asked, I shall receive
Things must get better with my life
I don’t want to live in the street
Here I sat in the chair

The Family Plead

1991-02-18T13:25:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Hello, people and the press
This was the hardest thing for us
My little girl was kidnapped in the park
We couldn’t bare of losing her
She was our pride and joy
Words couldn’t describe how we felt
Only the emotions spoke volumes for us
It broke our heart
Our precious girl was missing
We want everyone to be on the lookout
Please, whatever u do, call the police
Any lead may help capture the kidnapper
We want our little girl back home where she belongs
If you are a parent, you will doing a favor for your kid too
Please call the police
I offered $500,000 to the capture of the creep
Don’t evoke the kidnapper
Let the police do their job
My little girl is counting on you
Let bring her back home
We need to stop the madness everywhere
Your loved one may be at risk
If someone is suspicious, call the police
Please call the police
We might be too late
I really hope not
She could be already be dead
God, please give us the strength
We can’t let her to be dead
She deserved to be alive
Kids are harmless
Look at our tears
We’re crying out for help
We can’t let this ever happen again
Our kids should be safe at any cost
My heart goes out for every kid out there
We missed her very much
We loved her as much as life itself
God bless you

The Kidnapped Girl

1991-02-17T13:34:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Help me
Please somebody help me
Someone kidnapped me from the park
I didn’t saw his face
He wore a black mask
My mother tried to rescue me
He knocked her down to the ground
God, I was frightened
I didn’t know where he took me
He tied me up with rope
I can’t run away at all
God, he hurt me very badly
The rope was too tight around my ankles
He drove every direction
I couldn’t tell you where he took me
He confused me good in the ride
I was in a tiny room with a mattress on the floor
He served me food under the door
I can’t get out
The windows was bricked
No one will heard me scream
This was the worst nightmare of my young life
I wished my family would find me soon
I truly missed them
I cried every day in bed
The future looked so bleak for me

The Kidnapper

1991-02-16T13:32:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I kidnapped this girl
Oh, how much I wanted to
She was the perfect girl for me
Her parents was pretty rich
Of course, they will do anything to get her back
I wouldn’t give her back at all
They need to pay me dearly
She doesn’t come cheap
I won’t settle anything less than $2 million
If the police gets involve, the price will go up
I didn’t feel any remorse at all
No one will give me a break
I tried to find another job
They turned their back on me
It was so hard on me
I couldn’t pay the rent, the bills and etc
Desperate times means desperate measures
I had no other choice at all
I don’t give a damn about her family
I was a scapegoat for her daddy
He promised he will take care of everything
Bull!
He was only looking out for himself
He was a saint in everyone’s eyes
He could do no wrong
Why should I feel remorse about the kid?
I did it for the money and payback
He deserved all the pain I brought to him
He won’t get away with it
Revenge was sweet and tasty
It will be even sweeter when I get all the money
Until then, they won’t see her ever again

Jesus Christ Entered

1991-02-15T13:30:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Jesus Christ entered into my heart
I felt his presence in my being
It was an awesome feeling
I have never been so alive
I had his warmth
I had his love
I had his comfort
I celebrated my newfound happiness
I was at peace
He took all the pain away from him
I don’t have any more sorrows
I was glad I didn’t shut the door on him
I gave him all my problems
He changed my life drastically
Life couldn’t get any better than this

Non Believer

1991-02-14T13:29:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I don’t believe it
I just can’t
It was really, really him
Oh my God!
Damn, why couldn’t it be someone else?
I don’t believed in him
I had never believe that there was a God
I wasn’t one of his followers
I don’t believe in the bible either
It was a bunch of lies
Some verses are hypocritical
The bible misled people
I wished he hasn’t show up
He came too late, too many years passed
He wasn’t there when I need him the most
I was at the most lonely and horrifying time of my life
My parents was murdered outside of a restaurant
Then I was placed with my abusive aunt
Hello, what kind of God would do that to his own children?
I had an hard time accepting my parents’ death
I had to deal with my aunt too
I can’t trust him anymore
There was no God in my world
He was worthless in my life
I don’t feel sympathy or love from him at all
He was an illusion that a bunch of people made up
He was the almighty powerful God
Yeah, right
I can’t depend on an illusion
I was proud to admit that I was a atheist

Knock, Knock

1991-02-13T13:27:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Knock, knock
Who’s there?
There wasn’t any answer
Knock, knock
Knock, knock
I looked through the peephole
I couldn’t see anyone
I went back watching TV
Knock, knock
Who is it?
Knock, knock
Please go away
Knock, knock
I still can’t see someone through the peephole
It dawned on me
It could be someone short
I opened the door
I was wrong
Nobody was there
Knock, knock
I rushed to the door
Once again, nobody was there
I realized it could be those pesky kids
Knock, knock
Damn them, damn them to hell
I grabbed a cup of water
I opened the door and tossed it on them
Oops, it was my next-door neighbor
He heard some screaming from my place
I explained that the kids played nigger knocking
He mentioned nobody entered the apartments
I found that odd
I turned on the radio
Here we go again
Knock, knock
Knock, knock
Knock, knock
I tried to ignore it
The knock, knocks became louder than the music
I got madder
I opened the door
Nobody was there
I looked around outside
I couldn’t see anyone
I went back inside
Knock, knock
Why me?
I just want a relaxing day
Is that too much to ask?
Knock, knock
Hmm, that was strange
It was coming from inside of my place
Knock, knock
It drove me crazy
I searched everywhere for that person
I still couldn’t find anyone
Knock, knock
All along, I was such a fool
It was a different door
I felt it in my heart
It was Jesus Christ

New Man Of The House

1991-02-12T13:10:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My dad was killed in a car accident few months ago
It was upon me to take care my family
I was the oldest kid, 17 year old
The rest were 15, 12, 9 and 6
Our mom worked two jobs to support us
It was very hard on her
I made it easier for her
I quit the eleventh grade
Of course, she was pretty upset by it
She threatened to kick my ass if I didn’t go back
I knew she wouldn’t do such a thing
She can’t raise us all by herself
She needed help
I can always go back to school in my twenties
This wasn’t the time for school
Her two jobs and raising five kids took a toll on her
She wasn’t getting sleep at all
She dragged her feet everywhere
She could barely keep up with the kids
The kids did more chores around the house
The 15 babysat the rest and cooked
The 12 did the dishes and the bathroom
The 9 kept the rooms clean
The youngest was being a kid
We became responsible in our young ages
It pleased our mother very much
None of us was a huge problem
Yes, there were fights
We settled it ourselves
We didn’t want to bother her with the fights
She already had a big plate to handle
Most days, she worked 12-hour shifts at the restaurant
I worked with her for eight hours
Then, I went straight home
I made sure everything was fabulous before she came
She couldn’t done it without our help, mostly mine
I was the new man of the house

A Fatherless Void

1991-02-11T13:06:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My father passed away in 1973
It left a huge void in my life
I felt so empty inside
It crushed my being
I was four year old
It wasn’t right that I didn’t had a father to love
My parents was my whole world
I loved them dearly
As I got older, I wanted a man to love
A father figure would be there for me
I didn’t receive that much love from my mother
There were four of us, kids
There wasn’t enough mom to go around
Something strange happened to me
I developed feelings for men
I couldn’t understand why
I wasn’t expose to the gay lifestyle at that time
I haven’t met a gay person either
Being gay was the furthest thing from my mind
I just wanted a father to love
Yet, somehow it turned into something else
Why did it happen to me?
I can’t be that way, I just can’t
An absent father couldn’t make me gay
No way, no how
It wasn’t possible
Yes, I missed my dad so much
Yes, I wanted a man to love
Yes, I mostly stay home with my mom
That doesn’t make me gay
God, I just wanted a father to love
Instead, I gained sexual feelings for men
I had the fatherless void

My First Crush

1991-02-10T13:03:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I remembered him quite well
He was blonde, blue eyes and my brother’s best friend
We were about the same age
He lived next door to us in Cleveland
I wouldn’t dare to tell anyone about my crush
I just kept it inside of me
Besides, the other kids will make fun of me
I didn’t want to go through that trouble
I don’t think anyone would stand up for me
Back then, gay was off limits
No matter what, I wanted to spend all my time with him
He was the only person I could think of
My dad passed away
I didn’t have anyone to look up to
My brother wouldn’t cut it
He was the new man of the house
It wasn’t the same without our daddy
The blonde kid was someone I could talk to
Why not him?
He was closest to my age
He was a perfect friend
We got along just absolutely fabulous
My brother was kind of jealous
I always tag along
We did about everything together
Something big happened to all of us
My family moved away to DFW
We didn’t stay in touch at all
I was so sad that I wouldn’t have him as a friend
A void entered my heart
There went my first crush

Old Friends

1991-02-09T10:15:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Last month, I came upon an old friend online
I found his Christian web site
He was the pastor for Grace Fellowship
I couldn’t believed that
I remembered we were in the church choir
He came a long way since then; everyone did
I haven’t seen him in a long time
He moved to Austin with his lover
Today, I sent him an IM
He didn’t know who I was
I brought up our friends, the church and such
He still hasn’t have the slightest ideal
I sent my picture in an email
He finally recognized me as Queen
We caught up with each other’s lifes
He still lived in Austin with their new adoption baby
I was still a hell raiser in Hollyweird, so to speak!
He wondered when I was going to visit Dallas
I have no clue yet
My other friend tried to get me to come down last fall
Something came up
It have been too long since I last saw them
I can’t wait at all
Hopefully soon, I would see my old friends

My First Time

1991-02-08T10:56:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I was quite young
Ten year old, to be exactly
He was in high school
We lived across the street from each other
His mother was a lesbian and had a gay lover
We was quite close, as close as family
I knew I was gay, but I never act on those feelings
I found him quite attraction
A window opportunity opened for us
Nobody was at his home
We decided to fool around in the shed
I wasn’t being pressure by him
I just wanted to explore a male body
I was so freaking nervous
I didn’t know what to do
We took off our clothes
His was already up; I was getting there
I just hold it; that was all I did
He wanted to get inside of me
I wasn’t ready; I was scared too
We lay on the ground
He held me to cease my worries
There was nothing to be afraid of
It was okay
I got scared again, not because of him
Someone came running to the backyard
Damn, he will find us naked
There was a big hole in the door
We dressed as fast as we could
His young brother opened the door
He thought there was something up between us
We was speechless
We went on with our business
We hadn’t speak of the close call ever again
I didn’t want anyone to know about me
Of course, our mouths were shut
My family wouldn’t understand at all

Rainbow Freedom

1991-02-07T10:56:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Gays, Lesbians, and Bisexuals don’t have that much freedom
We tended to cave into society
A place where people listened to the world
They don’t treat us with respect
We cheated out of true happiness and selves
We was beaten for the people we was
We defeated by the world, but not by God
He gave us that life
No matter what the world believed
We was trapped in the closet to live unhappy lifes
Some gave up their lives
They believed it was a sin
Parents and friends grieved
It wasn’t a game
Our lifes were at stake
Wake up and smell the coffee
Nail this on your head
We was the same from God
We blamed this world
It caused great pain
Satan put lies in people’s heads
Others may never know the truth
Satan thought he was clever
Whatever he told you, we shall listen to our hearts
There won’t be any more slaps across our faces
We will be free from being trap in the closet
We will fight for our rights
We will march in the gay parades
We will continued to have our gay pride weekends
We knew in our hearts that we was born gay
Few people really don’t want to accept that
They want us to stay in the closet
They want us to live a normal life - Straight
God, please give us the freedom and the world
We richly deserved to live our lifes to the fullest
The minutes turned into hours
We burned to be the person that God made us
The truth will set us free from the closet to live our lifes
We wouldn’t trade our rainbow freedom

Snakes

1991-02-06T10:56:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Snakes was man’s worst enemy
They slithered in our lifes
The world was a living hell
We fell to the ground crying
The bell started to ring
They sung, “Destroy all comers!”
We drove out of The Garden Of Eden
We lived to get even with them
Let the snakes come near us
We will tear them apart
We vowed revenge
We took them to Doom Day
All snakes was dead meat
We brought a gigantic club with us
We sought out the revenge
They ought not to escape from us
We haunted them to the four corners
Nothing can sour our fun
The sun burned them to a crisp
Our lifes turned back to normal as normal it could be
The snake will be another life form or some sort of trouble
Till the next time, we will win for once and for all

Relationship

1991-02-05T10:56:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

We shared our lifes in a relationship
I cared to be love by him in the most ultimate way
We was lost in love, only if it’s for real
We sealed it with a kiss
We hit a homerun
We don’t sit there and do nothing
Something bounded to happen for us
I found my way to the bedroom
Heartbeats sounded for true love
I dove into bed in the heat of passion
I was defeated by love
I felt it in my heart
It melts me in his loving arms
We was unity to receive each other’s love
I was never alone in bed
We really want comfort in one bed
We will remain in love forever
That was the best way to go, among other things
I craved to love him with my heart
I hugged him with my arms
I kissed him on my lips
I hold him with my hand
I saw the beauty in him
I touched him with my fingers
I felt his life in the most highest
I can’t get enough of him
I want a long lasting relationship
Not just for sex
I want friendship, comfort, warmth and love
Nothing can tear us apart
He was the one and only man for me

So Long, Love

1991-02-04T11:00:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

So long, love
I will miss you in my heart
You was everything to me
But something drastic changed our relationship
I couldn’t love you the same way anymore
From deep down, I wished I could
Our love wasn’t good enough for us
I can’t deal with your HIV status
It was hard for me
I already lost many friends to AIDS
I couldn’t bared of going through it again
I can’t handle it anymore
I know I hurt you deeply
I hope someday you would forgive me
You deserved someone much better than me
I can’t be your strength
I don’t have the strength for the both of us
The moment we found out, it crushed my spirit
I thought we would have a lifetime of love
That love disappeared into thin air
I wanted so much to be there for you
You was my angel
Heavens awaits you with open arms
For me, it would probably be hell for me
I gave up on us
You will find strength within you
You will fight the disease with all your being
God will give you a fighting chance
God will send you a long lasting boyfriend
You deserved much more than life has to offer you
Whatever you do, don’t give up on yourself
I wasn’t worth of your love
I gave up on you
I was scared for my life
I was foolish enough to have sex with one condom
For that, I wasn’t good enough for you
So long, love

Hurt By Love

1991-02-03T11:00:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I didn’t expect it at all
He didn’t feel any resentful toward me
He was his own lovable self
I thought we became closer, thanks to my HIV status
He didn’t distance himself at all
He went to visit his sick mother in Dallas
I figured he would be back within a week
I was counting the days he would come home
A week was up; he hasn’t come home yet
Nor, he called me either
He may have missed his plane
I waited by the phone
Nothing so far
I realized his mom wanted him to stay for couple more days
I went on with my life
A thought came to my mind
He wouldn’t pick up his paycheck
He was still out of town
So, I decided to pick it up for him
His boss already knew me
I went to his work
The boss mentioned he was at work every day
He wanted to work the late shift
I found that odd
What happened to his sick mother?
I called his mother
She explained everything was fine
She was healthy as a horse
She hasn’t heard from him over a month
God, it told me one thing
He wanted no part of me anymore
My heart broke in a million of pieces
How come he doesn’t want me?
We was perfect for each other
It must be the reason he left
I was HIV positive and he wasn’t
I couldn’t stop crying
Love wasn’t supposed to be that way
He can’t leave me
We belonged together no matter what
I can’t face the disease alone
I need my boyfriend beside me
He was my strength
I can’t go at it alone
God, please let him to come home
I missed him
I still loved him
He just can’t stop loving me
He just can’t
What am I going to do?
He wasn’t that afraid as much I was
I was living with the virus
Damn, I hate him now
He abandoned me
Why, God, why?
He can’t abandoned me
I did nothing wrong at all
I didn’t plan of getting the deadly disease
It just happen
There wasn’t a thing I could do about it
I had to live with it for the rest of my life
Where were my support and my love?
He went out of the door and never returned
God, I hate him for leaving me
Do you know what was worst?
He didn’t have the courage to leave a Dear John Letter
Damn, I was so alone and hurt by love

Frightening Scared

1991-02-02T11:00:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Dear lord!
I hoped my boyfriend don’t get it
We were being so careful
One thing led to the next
We couldn’t help ourselves
He was pist off at me
He ran straight to the shower to clean his ass quickly
Damn, why him?
God, don’t let him get the virus
Please, God
We was in passionate mood
There weren’t enough condoms
We just took a risk with one condom
We were hot and heavy
The condom broke inside of him
He felt it coming inside
He screamed, “Get it out! Get it out!”
He was truly frightened of me for the first time
He blamed me for pushing him into sex
Hello, he wanted it as much I want it
We hadn’t sex since our HIV tests
We waited for a while till we had sex
We wanted information about safe sex
I couldn’t believed it
He thought that I purposely gave it to him
God, what was he thinking?
I would never ever do such a thing
I loved him very much
I cared a lot for his safety
He need to realized that things happened
We could have went to the store for more condoms
We wanted to stay in the passionate mood
Therefore, we took a chance with one condom
I got him to calm down
He felt sorry for the nasty thing he said to me
Of course, I forgave him
I hold him in his arms
We fell asleep in bed

HIV Window

1991-02-01T10:38:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My boyfriend and I had a fabulous relationship
Our love was so passionate, loving and caring
Nothing could ever tear our love apart
We was on top of the world
One night, I wasn’t feeling well
I was feverish
I threw up couple of times
I thought it was something I ate
I slept it off till the morning
Damn, I was still sick to my stomach
I paid a visit to my doctor
He checked me out
He was curious about something
I wondered what
He asked, “If I ever had an HIV test?”
God, I took it once before
There wasn’t a need for a new one
I hardly fool around, let alone do drugs
Couple weeks later, the doctor gave me the news
I was HIV positive
How could it be?
I know my lover didn’t have it
We didn’t do drugs or slept around
To be on the safe side, the doctor checked him out too
He turned out to be HIV negative
We was both shocked
What happened?
How could I got it and he doesn’t?
The doctor explained I had it for a while
I was in the window; it didn’t show up at all
This time, HIV appeared on the test
My lover and I need to learn to live with it
Of course, we need to practice safe sex
My boyfriend wanted me double up on the condoms
He doesn’t want the virus
And I didn’t want to give it to him either
Our safety comes first

HIV Plead

1991-01-31T10:38:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I got home from work
My lover wasn’t pleased with me about something
I had never saw him that angry before
We had small fights
Then we kissed and made up
This time, it was quite different
I saw the fire in his eyes
He didn’t hold back at all
He claimed I couldn’t be trusted
I put his life on the line
Dear lord, I had a feeling he knows
I was being so careful with the secret
He accidentally saw my meds in the closet
He was looking for something nice to wear tonight
We supposed to celebrate our six-month anniversary
I wished he didn’t have my apartment key
I should have known better
I thought he wouldn’t ever find out
I wasn’t being careless
I was in the perfect health
I tried to calm him down
I wanted to hold him
He pushed me away
I didn’t mean any harm at all
He slapped me around the face
I pleaded with him to understand
I just wanted to be love
No one ever wants a HIV lover
I meant well
He got to believe that
Yes, what I did was wrong
I should have tell him in the beginning
I couldn’t bare the thought of losing love again
I didn’t want to lose him at all
He was my man, my man to love
I can’t live without his love
He means the world to me
I wanted to be love
What was wrong of loving someone?
He threw the dirty little secret in my face
I put his life at risk, a death sentence
How come I do such a nasty thing?
He claimed I should be arrest for attempted murder
He can’t call the police, he just can’t
Love conquers all
We would get through this together
I promised there weren’t any more secrets
Everything was out in the open
I felt guilty for keeping it from him
Come on, dear, you can get over it
He slapped me again
He made a good point, how could he?
He doesn’t know he have the HIV virus.
It would be weeks to know
I wished I could take the HIV back from him
He doesn’t deserve the disease
He mentioned that I deserved it and even AIDS
Please, I was begging him
Take me back
Take me back
I got on my knees, pleading with him
My tears speak volumes
I need him in my life to love
He wouldn’t heard of it
He gave me the key back and stormed out of my apartment
I lost him forever
God, What have I done?
I only wanted to be love
Is that a crime?
I didn’t want to be alone
I only wanted to be love by someone special

Terrible Secret

1991-01-30T10:38:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I had a wonderful boyfriend
I was truly in love with him
I couldn’t stop thinking about him day and night
He was the most caring, loving person I ever love
Our love was just perfect as God’s love
He was the only man for me
We were committed to each other
We basically saw each other about every day
We didn’t have time for anyone else
We wanted to spend every waking moment
We had a blast everywhere we go
We didn’t want the love to end
It hurts to tell you
Our love didn’t last at all
He withheld something important from me
I couldn’t believe it at all, not for a second
I was beyond shock
It destroyed my feelings for him
He kept a secret from me
All this time, I didn’t know he was HIV positive
My God! We had unsafe sex
He didn’t like the feel of the condoms
Damn, I should have listen to my gut feelings
I got so freaking angry
Why didn’t he tell me about his HIV status?
He has some nerves
He claimed he loved me with all his heart
How could he do that to me?
Keeping secrets wasn’t love
It was lies, lies and more lies
Wait till I see him
I will give him a piece of my mind
He would regret the day we met at the club
Damn, we should have been more careful for sex
If I became HIV positive, I would kill him
I wished I didn’t find his HIV medication by accidentally
Our love was perfect
He destroyed my life from that terrible secret

Daddy’s Death

1991-01-29T10:41:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My daddy recently died from cancer
We were on the way to his funeral
I just don’t understand at all
My daddy was supposed to be there for us
Yet, he remained cold and silence
I wished he could talk to me again
Or play ball with me
I missed his love and hugs
Why couldn’t he be there for the baby and me?
The baby needs him more than I do
I was only five year old
My oldest brother was blessed to have a dad all his life
He just gave up his job for us
He wouldn’t go back to Hollywood
He would pick up where daddy left off
I wasn’t happy at all
A huge piece from my heart left a void
Everyone was hurting
Our father was my life
I don’t care for the Hollywood stars
He was the perfect role model for me
Things was never be the same without daddy
He made us laugh, cried, obedient, love and others
He told us wonderful stories about his life
I will always remember him
My baby sister would remember him too
I will pass his stories on to her
I will tell her everything our loving daddy
My mother and brother helped me to cope with daddy’s death

Father’s Last Days

1991-01-28T10:41:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My father was dying from cancer
He hasn’t that much to live
I haven’t seen him in years
My mother wanted all the kids be there for his last days
She was expecting the worst any day
I was the oldest
I had to be there for my siblings
They would need all the support from me
Their eyes was in sorrow
I need to be brave for them
Some of them wouldn’t take it
The second youngest was five year old
He may not understand death that well
He was the most heartbroken of them all
Our father was his role model
He looked up to him
He doesn’t want him to go
He needs his daddy
It just broke my heart for him
The other kid was just a baby
She wouldn’t know her daddy
She has no memories at all
She will grow up without a daddy
Well, I decided something
It will make my sibs very happy
Since they need a role model, I could be it for them
Our father was the best dad we ever had
He was a good role model too
I would give up my job in Hollywood and move back home
There was no ands, buts or ifs about it
My family really needs me
They need structure in their young lifes
Our daddy was leaving soon

Hollyweird Freak

1991-01-27T10:41:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I met this wonderful person online
We had so many things in common
We loved the beaches, the mountains, the malls and more
We basically talked every night online
It was a wonderful feeling I finally found someone to my liking
We didn’t want to rush into anything fast
Let love happen for us
He wanted to meet me at a coffee shop
I declined; I don’t drink coffee
He suggested a movie
I was tempted, but declined
There wasn’t any movie I want to see at that time
I was more into classics
He suggested eating out
I would love to, but…
Forget about it
I was known as a Hollyweird freak
I haven’t tell him my real nature
Some people wouldn’t “understand” me at all
All the times, he wanted to meet
I refused every single time
I don’t want to be bother with those people
The truth was I was protecting myself from hurt
It is all I could do right now
I need to get to know them better
Then, I will know I could trust them
If trust wasn’t there, I want no part of them
Love may be around the corner
The hurt was too deep to trust anyone
I can’t let it happen ever again
Shallow people hurt me so many times
No one could fix the pain I had
I just can’t take any risks
I know deep down I would get hurt again

Euthanasia Case

1991-01-26T10:41:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Things didn’t go as plan in court
I was really in deep water
The jury found me guilty of the murders
The court banned me from ever being a nurse
I was in disbelieved
I can’t gasp of the murder charges
I was only helping the patience with their dying wish
Yet, no one believed the honest truth
What have I done to deserve prison time?
Damn, I wished I was more secretive
They wouldn’t suspect a thing at all
I don’t feel guilty what I did
I helped them the best way I know how
I was against the wall
I denied that I wanted to kill them
I wanted to ease the patients' suffering through death.
Euthanasia was illegal in Hungary
Damn, I didn’t knew that
That was my downfall
I should have been more careful with the murders
The patience expressed to have their life terminated
In my case, euthanasia wasn’t in my favor
I was branded as a cold-blooded murderer in court

Was I Guilty Of The Murders?

1991-01-25T10:34:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Was I guilty of the murders?
I was a nurse at a Hungary hospital
The patients’ pain was too much to take
They couldn’t bare it any longer
They were too weak to do anything
My heart goes out for them
I wished I could help them somehow
They knew of a way to make it happen
Lethal injection will end the pain for them
That was a fabulous ideal
The law was the furthest thing from my mind
I shouldn’t get in that much trouble
They wanted my help
I can’t let them down
They were depending on me
I had a good reason at night
I might as well do the injection on my work shift
No one will be suspicious of the deaths
It was the act of God
It was their time to go
I was their only solution and hope
Word got around at the hospital
The deaths was quickly within days from one another
The staff found it very odd that the deaths occurred the same way
There was a killer among us
“A killer,” I said, softly
I wasn’t a killer
They gave me permission to use the lethal injection
It was between them and me
They didn’t want anyone else to know
It was best that way
We knew the doctors wouldn’t allow the injection
The fingers was pointed in my direction
I confessed that I killed them
No one was please with me
The police arrested me
I was outrage; they had no right at all
The patients wanted to die that way
Was I guilty of the murders?

Me, A Racist

1991-01-24T10:22:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Say what?
How could I be one?
I had all types of friends
If I don’t like his kind, I won’t hang out with them
He has lots of nerve to call me a racist
It has never cross my mind
At least, I didn’t use the word, “Nigger”
Some words were nothing but trouble
Using a word doesn’t make a racist
I was describing someone by a color
I still don’t understand
I didn’t mean any harm
It was only a word
I truly felt like he insulted me
He hardly knew me
Yet, I, somehow, became a racist to him
What happened?
A black man was under the impression that I was a racist
For what?
Because I used the word, black
What’s up with that?
He offended me by the accusation
I did nothing wrong
He asked, “Why did I used that word in my poem?”
Hello, the writer put it in the story
Therefore, I didn’t want to change his story
She always wore black and had long black hair
She was known as the Black Angel
My poem was true to the writer’s story
Like I said, it was only a word
There was no harm done
Me, a racist

Kissing Cousins

1991-01-23T10:22:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My son was involved with someone special
I had a bad feeling about Ashley
Hmm, she was a bad girl
It wasn’t what you were thinking
Ashley was a sweet, loving girl we ever met
Who ever thought love could turn in something awful
She has the mostly gentle touch, beautiful hair and a good heart
I couldn’t describe her any better than that
She was perfect in every way for Brad
I could go on forever about her
A twisted fate entered in their perfect world
We hardly knew anything about her family
We always wondered about it
I noticed something different
Was it the way she dresses?
Was it the way she talks?
Was it the way she sings?
Was it the way she acts?
For a reason, her smile looked so similar
I knew I saw that smile somewhere before
I couldn’t place it
I knew deep down there was something was up
I decided to looked in Ashley’s past
I didn’t left any stones unturned
I didn’t stop till I was looking for
I met Ashley’s father for the first time
I felt I knew him somewhere
Once again, I couldn’t place it
I dug for answers
He mentioned he was raised in Dallas
His last name was Carey
Carey, that name sounds familiar to me
What was his mother’s maiden name?
“Ekert,” he replied
That name rung a bell
They went up to his attic
He mentioned he was adoption by The Carey Family
He gave me the same smile I saw on his daughter
He showed me old family pictures
I noticed the old lady’s smile in the picture
It dawn on me that she was my mother
God, the smile
I haven’t seen the smile in decades till Ashley
I completely forgotten that smile
I was beyond shock
He couldn’t believed it either
He finally found his long lost sister
He searched for his family for a long time
He wondered what was wrong
I told him everything
He was in disbelief
Our kids can’t get married today
They was “kissing” cousins

Nancy’s Jealousy

1991-01-22T10:22:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I don’t know where to begin
I thought I was helping out my boyfriend
He needed some help in some classes
I couldn’t help him
We weren’t in the same classes
There was a girl named Susan, who likes Tom
I didn’t like that one bit
She knows that too
I told her to leave my man alone
I believed she back down from him
Then the situation came up from nowhere
Tom was flunking in some classes
His parents demanded him to get some counseling
Of course, Susan was in the top of the class
Tom suggested Susan for help
I couldn’t stand that
She would use that to get close to him
God, I really hate that
Why her?
I don’t trust her at all
Tom persuaded me to go with it
She was the only help for him
I kept an eye on them
Boy, she still got it bad for him
Damned her! Damned her to hell!
I wanted so badly to tell her off
She has no right to be with my man
God, Susan really gets on my nerves
Who cares if we staged a fight in front of everyone?
Tom was still my boyfriend
No other women would have him at all
He was all mine
I got to admit
I was so jealous of Tom & Susan

Smart Plan

1991-01-21T10:23:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My charm really worked on the smart girl, Susan
She didn’t suspect a thing at all
My girlfriend and I staged a fight in front of everyone.
Everyone believed we broke up
We fooled them pretty good
Susan felt sorry for me
I was proud of this plan
Some people thought I was that stupid!
Fools, they were bloody fools
They would see how smart I was
I would pass my classes with flying colors
That would shut them up for good
Nothing would ever stop me
Susan basically helped me every night
I should become an actor
I used my charm as an advantage
It worked marvelous
Soon, I would get good grades, thanks to my plan
There was one glitch thou
Would you believed jealousy from my Nancy?
I didn’t count on that
It was the furthest thing from my mind
I spent every waking moment with Susan
Nancy really hated it very much
She figured I wouldn’t spend all my time with Susan
Boy, we were both wrong
The exams was valuable in those classes

Smooth Versus Smarts

1991-01-20T10:23:00.000-08:00

Smooth Versus Smarts
By Kazz Falcon
I happened to fail some classes
I wasn’t that good in English or math
I hated those subjects
I felt I wasn’t that smart
They was hard classes
I got to pass those classes
My future relied on my good grades
I might as well quit school
Then again, I was a smooth talker
There was a certain girl who likes me
I could pretend I like Susan
She would do my homework for me
Why not I use her smarts?
She was getting what she wants - me
I wouldn’t mind spending time with her
For the time being, I would be hers
Of course, I would continue to see my girlfriend, Nancy
Susan can’t know about that
I was depending on her to help me pass the classes
The moment I pass my classes, I would dump the girl
Where is my phone?
I need to put my smart plan in motion

In The Habit

1991-01-19T10:23:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

These past few months, I was lazy
I hardly did anything
I mostly stay home and watch TV
I really don’t have an exciting life to live
It was so boring as hell
Even Hell was more exciting than me
My life has nothing to offer
I was out of work so long
I wasn’t hurting for money
I should be happy that I am living
But, I wasn’t happy
Life was passing me up
I felt like I wasn’t part of the world
No one noticed me
I was going nowhere
I put off lots of things, including my writing
It wasn’t a huge part of my life anymore
I just don’t care about anything
Why should I?
I wasn’t in the habit

Beer

1991-01-18T10:15:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Beer
Cheers
NOT!
I don’t want to get that drunk
I was a punk for going over the limit
I dared to be foolish
My life was no longer a care
I stared at my beer, wanting more
I bared my troubles to the beer
I hope the problems would go away
The beer cheered me up a little while
I sat down at the bar, drunk
I zoomed off in the car
I was far away from home
Somebody got in the way while I drove too fast
I lasted till I ran into a building
The will to live wasn’t there
It made me ill to give up my life
A miracle occurred
A light appeared and showed me the truth
I heard him loud and clear
I had a drinking problem
Jesus was my saving grace
I had another chance to live
I danced in excitement
I committed myself to a rehab program
I received greetings to a sober life
I had a life without beer

Broadway Show?

1991-01-17T10:17:00.000-08:00

Broadway Show?
By Kazz Falcon
The debt laid heavy on my soul
We had a few days to go
I wasn’t getting that much sleep
I kept turning in the bed
I gasped for the last straw
It crushed my inner being
How could I let it go that far in debt?
I thought the show was worth it
I put a fortune in the show
Damn, the enthused opportunity just carried me away
I wanted to make everyone know I could handle the pressure
I was way over my head
It was my first shot at Broadway
It could be my last
I didn’t want to blow my chance
Then again, I could ruin it for everyone
They deserve to know the truth
It could make us or break us
It was time to tell them about the debt
Would the curtain open up for the Broadway show?

In Debt

1991-01-16T10:13:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

What could I say?
I put all my hard earned money in my dream
I was excited about my first Broadway show
It wasn’t anything like that on Broadway before
The casting, the producer and the director were fabulous
Everything fell into their place
There was one slight problem
Even before the show start, I was already in debt
I haven’t told anyone yet
I didn’t want to let anyone down
They put their heart and soul in the show
I couldn’t break their hearts
We worked so hard
We put too much time and effort
Damn, what would I do?
I couldn’t bare the truth
I had a hard time with it
I hoped to God that the show would be a huge success
It would be a miracle itself
Everyone would still have jobs
The audience would keep on coming
The show must go on
How could it?
I was in debt

Shooting For Stardom

1991-01-15T10:13:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I set that goal a long time ago
It was very hard to break into show business
I wanted to be the next Fred Astaire
I freaked so many people with my dancing
They didn’t believe I had a chance
I had a chance to live my dream
I danced out my heart for everyone
Lance loved every minute of it
I took the offer I couldn’t refuse
He offered a dance contract to tour with his company
He knew I was one of the best dancers around
I was a hard act to follow
Joy shouted from my mouth
Roy couldn’t believe it
I showed him the contract
I blew the dance teacher away
“How about that? I am your first superstar. You’re no longer in debt,” I said.
Roy became so gay and cried
One of his students finally made it to big time
His time finally arrived in the spotlight
He received a lifetime achievement for forty years of hard work
We lived our dreams by shooting for stardom

New Attitude

1991-01-14T10:12:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

A sweet person turned into a monster
He has an attitude like a drag queen
What a rude person he turned out to be
He wasn’t the same person he once was, a fun loving person
The day came when he started to hang out with the wrong crowd
I banged my head into the pole
It led me to a conclusion
The land of drugs entered his life
He fallen deeper in the pool
He thought it was cool
To most people, it was a foolish thing a person could do
There was nothing I could do about it
I have to sit and wait till he learn his lesson
I want no part of him
He lost a good friend
The cost was the drugs in his life
I had a host of other friends to spend my time with
They lend their support and love toward me
I tended to do the same thing
I set my best foot forward
I walked into a full room of partying
We talked highly of each other
I was so intrigue and felt comfortable with them
I became a part of them, vice versa
I noticed something far across the room
There was doom in somebody’ eyes
Eyes I didn’t recognize
The face was completely covered with darkness
He raced up to me
It became clearer for all to see
My God! It was my old friend
I haven’t seen him in a couple of years
A tall order of tears spilt into crying
It broke down the tainted wall
He fell to his knees
He couldn’t bare the pain in his stomach
I picked up the pieces instantly
He was sick of the drugs messing up his life
In the nick of time, he kicked the drugs out of his life
The old attitude replaced the new attitude

Winds

1991-01-13T10:12:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Winds breezes into our lifes whenever it want to
It has no control
It craved wherever it goes
Whether it’s North, South, East or West
Any way was more like it
It wasn’t like birds
It played for Mother Nature
It soared from many directions
It goes to faraway places we have never seen before
Bad weather changed it to dangerous winds
The fierce and charging affect it has everywhere
It knocked things over and destroyed property
We hide for cover in the underground shelter
The winds has it ride all over the place
Slowly, but surely, things went back to normal
It left no tracks behind
The wind was invisible
There were no wings about the winds
They wasn’t birds flying freely, controlling their directions
It has their own ways to follow, no wings to fly with
Winds

Disappointments

1991-01-12T10:05:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I wasn’t made for disappointments
They doesn’t set well with me
They broke my heart every time it has a chance to
Tears choke down on my knees
I had a hard time swallowing defeat
I pouted like a small kid lost his toy
I shouted for things to go my way
Which wasn’t much to say
I lay down on my bed till further notice
It got me in a foul mood
The soul wasn’t too please
I was too depressed to do something about it
My life messed up bad from right to left
The wife was sad about life is going for me
She called her dad to make things come alive
The latest fad was happening
The TV ad was a way to get what we want in life
I was glad my poems is reaching out
The people can relate to
They had a sound mind about their lives
They know they wasn’t alone
Disappointments were a pain in the ass
My happiness was the gain from my dreams

Disappeared Into The Night

1991-01-11T10:04:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Disappeared Into The Night
I was beaten from a fight
The sight of things got to me
My lover was a psychopath
I did my math
I kid you not
I was hot on his trail
I feared the worse has happen
Hear me, I was deadly afraid of him
It’s so clear
A psychopath will do anything destruction
Something I want to put a stop to
Right now, I can’t do anything
Except wait and see
I must accept that fact
I trusted things weren’t that bad
I disappeared into the night

Living Alone

1991-01-10T10:04:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Living Alone
I can’t stand that stone
I felt empty inside
I tried to hide from misery
I had nobody to talk to
I need somebody
Loneliness came upon me
I seek a roommate
Please! No freaks allowed
This place has been so bleak
Speak up, somebody
I was nobody special
I was a regular guy
My last roommate disgusts me
The police busted him for using drugs
All I want is to share my place with someone
I truly care for a people’s person
Someone like myself
A person I can live with
Full of happiness and lots of fun
Why should I be living alone?

My Birthday

1991-01-09T10:04:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My birthday was a very special day
I celebrated my new age with love ones
My friends sang “Happy Birthday To You.”
We ate cake and ice cream
I blow out the candles for a wish
A wish I can’t say out loud
I opened the presents
People saw my face glow bright
It was right to say, “Thank you.”
I shared my birthday with family and friends
They were so near to my heart
Tears has fallen from my eyes
It means the world to me
I was moving up in the years
I loved to get older
I can’t stay young forever
I may want to
I wasn’t the quite the same
The years were taking a toll on me
Another year flew by
We came upon another birthday

Love Costs

1991-01-08T10:03:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Love costs
My lover gave me some money in an envelope
He didn’t have time to go to the bank
He was running late for his job at City Walk
I took the money home with me
Tomorrow, I went to his place early
He expected his money in the morning
Much to my surprise, I had a bad feeling
Yes, I had over $500 in cash on me
If I wasn’t careful, someone may rob me
So far, so good
No one was suspicious on the subway
They hardly know me
I got off the train and headed upstairs
The bad feeling wouldn’t go away
Damn, would someone notice how nervous I was?
$500 was a lot to carry on me
I hurried along to his place
The bad feeling got stronger and stronger
It became overwhelmed that I need some time by myself
I went back to the Hollywood/Highland mall
The bad feeling wasn’t that strong anymore
I figured that nobody would rob me
I was in board daylight and safe
I made tracks to his place once again
It came back stronger as ever
I don’t want to run away from the feeling
If someone robs me, it was meant to be
I need to face the fear
I used my key to get in the building
Once inside, I didn’t feel safe at all
The feelings troubles me
I knocked on his door
There was no answer
I knocked again
Still, there was no answer
I was about to leave when….
I heard a breathing noise coming inside the place
I didn’t know what to make of it
It suddenly dawn on me
What if my lover was having trouble breathing?
My God! What could I do?
Should I call 911?
Should I get the apartment manager?
Should I break down the door?
I made up my mind
I unlocked the door with my key
Then, the unthinkable happened
Someone robbed me of love
Trust could cost even more
I was $500 richer
Love costs

Ending Love

1991-01-07T01:31:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I picked up this sexy man
We went back to my place
My lover wouldn’t be back in a couple of days
We stripped down and jumped in the bed
He has the most beautiful body I ever lay my hands on
He was smooth, blond, blue eyes, fabulous smile and very muscular
I had an awesome time with the hunk
We went from the bed to the floor to the kitchen to the shower and back to bed
We were pretty exhausted
We fell asleep in each other’s arms
By that time, my lover showed up from his business trip
I wasn’t expecting him to come home early
He was excited that the deal was done within two days
He came home with flowers for his bee
But I had extra honey in bed
He buzzed to our bedroom
My fling stung him straight to his heart
His shouting waked us
I baked our love to a burning crisp
The blonde suddenly put on his cloths
He mentioned he didn’t know I had a lover
My lover wasn’t furious at him, but he believed him
It wasn’t the first time I did it
The blonde left us alone
The lover turned his attention to me
He couldn’t believe I had sex with another man again
The last time, it almost killed our love
I convinced him otherwise
Our love was strong to overcome anything
This time, he wouldn’t look at me
He got a suitcase from the closet and started to pack
I wondered where was he going
He gave me a stern look
“I’m not going anywhere! You are! Get out of my house and life!”
I pleaded with him to let me stay with him
He was tone-deaf to the loud screeching music in his ears
To him, that music was ending love

Lusty Eyes

1991-01-06T01:31:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Lusty eyes
Who do we seek tonight?
We had all night to find sex
My lover was away on business
He wouldn’t know about it
Hmm, we could go to the bathhouse
Perhaps, the sex club
Damn, there was one problem thou
I had no money on me, nor a credit card
We shared the same checking account
Those places were out of the question
I could go clubbing
The again, I need money to drink
There was one thing left to do
I drove around till someone interesting comes along
Don’t fail me, lusty eyes

Lust

1991-01-05T01:30:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

What is lust?
Is it something that God made up to take place of love?
I think NOT!
They were two different things
They were just the opposite of each other
Love was one on one
It was the unity of two people joining through God
It was more serious than lust
Lust damaged the body, the mind, the spirit and the soul
It brought destruction to people’s lifes
Diseases among the people, troubles arises and untrusting lovers
Love takes control of lust
Let God conquer the lustful thoughts
Your miserable life of no love will end
Love comes from God, the true love of everyone
Lust isn’t love
It truly contains meaningless sex with people
You really don’t love
You don’t have the desire of real love
Take it from me
One-night stands have no love but to fulfill people’s sexual needs and desire
Real love counts the most for people in love, not in lust
Don’t fool around with list versus love
It was a losing battle
You would get burn from it
Let love comes from God
The right person would come along

Feeling Left Out

1991-01-04T01:30:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My dear friends
I tell you a true story
I hate feeling left out
It tore me apart; I wanted to shout
I feared that nobody want me around
Please say a little pray for me
Who else to play with other than friends?
Strangers was no way to be a part of a group
Danger lies ahead into all sorts of troubles
Troubles I may never get out
My friends did their own thing without me
I sang the blues in a jail cell
I failed to realized that…
He was an undercover cop trying to sell drugs
Well enough, I took the bait
He booked me on charges of soliciting
Now, I looked to my friends for help
How come you were never there when I need you?
More ever before, I was scare that I may never get out
Where was my friend, who takes good care of me?
I was in no mood to play games
All I want was to go home and be a part of a real group
Sometimes, I felt left out of things I don’t do with friends
Look what happened to me with the strangers
The police arrested me
I sang the blues
Please bring the bail money
I want to set sail on the ocean with friends
The last thing I was left out from the start
The hurt cast my eyes to cry
The fast lane ended me up in jail
A place I have never wanted to be
I learned I face life in prison
My friends was the ace in the hole
I had no one else to turn to
I was so alone and feeling left out

Losing Control

1991-01-03T01:24:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I was wrong about the drugs
I couldn’t stop doing them
It took over my life
I thought I had it under control
It sought out my vulnerable
I ought to know better
It brought me a lifetime of hell
Damn, why was I so stupid?
I figured the drugs wouldn’t get me down
Oh, how much I frown!
The tiny problems crept up to big problems
Once in a while, I missed paying some bills
Then, the further the drugs got to me
I couldn’t pay my rent a few times
My life was a total disaster
An ounce of weakness didn’t stop the drugs
I let it happen
I had no one to blame, but me
I need to take responsible for my actions
The drugs kept on picking on the sore spots
It torpedoed me straight into living hell
The problems became greater than me
Damn, I was such a fool!
I don’t need drugs to have a fun time
Well, I learned my lesson the hard way
Losing Control

Addiction

1991-01-02T01:24:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Addiction
I was lusting for more
Something I couldn’t stop doing
I got to have it whenever
I got to do it
I was in the need for it
I was speeding ahead to self-destruct
I was feeding by the addiction
An addiction I can’t handle
It always comes back to me
I felt a need for it
It doesn’t last that long
I wanted more time
It was destroying my life altogether
It was a ploy to ruin my life
I was toying with my addiction
I blasted into space
I lasted till I had my fun in the sun
I was foolish enough to fall for the addiction
I may not even make it out alive
My life was at stake
Friends warned me
“Wake up and see the light,
Forsake the addiction before it’s too late.”
Tears shouted from the eyes
I wanted out to get help
It was one rough bout to handle alone
Fallen tears made me tough and strong
I threw the bed habit out of my life
The addiction was coming to an end
It sent me a journey back home where I belong
Addiction, so long

Dream Realization

1991-01-01T01:24:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I woke up from my ongoing dream
I couldn’t see where I was
It felt so familiar, but I was stuck there
I didn’t want to wake up at all
I kept on having the same dream all over again
It got stronger and stronger
I had an urge to solve the dream
I couldn’t find any answers in the dream book
What was the meaning?
Hmm, I figured to solve it was dream again
I hoped the dream would become clear
We wanted to know the truth behind the dream
I went in a deep sleep, alone in bed
My lover didn’t want to distract me
I could see the dream again
All around me was darkness
I couldn’t walk straight
I ran into some things along the way
I traveled many miles to get where I was
The closer I get; the urge became stronger
It got a hold on me
It dragged me to somewhere familiar
Things was clearer to me
Old friends was dining with me
I was at our old place in Hollywood
A faceless man showed up on the balcony
He said, “Home is where the heart is.”
I repeated it once more
“Home is where the heart is.”
Home…home…home, Denver, Hollywood, Denver
My lover heard me mumbled in my sleep
He tried to shake me up, but I wouldn’t bulge
He splashed water on my face
I looked at him; wishing he was in my dream
I explained the dream to him
He was anxious to know the faceless man
He was the key of the dream
It dawn on me that I was living with my man in Hollywood
Suddenly, he said, “Home is where the heart is.”
He was the faceless man
I was at peace with my lover
Denver doesn’t feel home at all
It wasn’t right for us
We made a huge mistake of moving to Denver
We knew what we got to do to make things right
The dream was a sign from God
We were on the way back to our real home
Hollywood was always a dream

What Could It Be?

1990-12-31T01:24:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

What could it be?
We searched for answers low and high
We ended up empty handed
We still couldn’t place it
For some odd reason, we had a big hole in our lifes
My unemployment couldn’t be it
We didn’t have a problem with it in the beginning
I wasn’t working when we fell in love
Of course, I was going to school
School took up most of my time
My lover wanted me to get a good education
An education was very important to the both of us
Something wasn’t right for us
I felt it deep down in my soul
I knew we didn’t give up our happiness
We had the life we want in Denver
The big hole has a profound affect
It was really driving us crazy
God, please give us a sign
You could tell us
Something was missing from our lifes
What could it be?

Couldn’t It?

1990-12-30T01:19:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

We settled into our new place quite well
We have been here for a few months
Everything was going smoothly for us
Life couldn’t be more perfect
He loves his new job
I couldn’t find anything yet
I kept on trying my best
My lover doesn’t mind
We could afford to live on one income
He claimed I don’t have to work
We gained new friends in the apartment building
We hang out with them; the movies, the mall, the clubs and more
Something struck me
Deep down, there was something missing in our lifes
We can’t place it
Yeah, our lifes was different
We were happy
Don’t get me wrong
Denver was a wonderful city
There were many things to do
Our lifes was active
But, there was something else
Damn, what was it?
We had everything we had in Hollywood
God, please help me
Why do we felt like we have a big hole in our lifes?
Our lifes were perfect as it can be
What could it be?

New Life In A City

1990-12-29T01:19:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My lover has an opportunity for a new job
We both were excited about moving
He would make more money
Of course, I have to look for another job.
We need to move within a few days
He found out about it today
His boss felt he was right for the job
We didn’t expect that job at all
We was comfortable living in Hollywood
We was happy with our lifes
We had wonderful friends too
We have to rebuild our lifes in Denver
We must sell our furniture in a short notice
Maybe, we could put it in the storage
Who knows?
We may need it again.
Hmm, or we could sub rent our apartment
Then again, we don’t have that much time left
What to do? What to do?
If we knew, he would get the new job
We could have did it a lot sooner
We don’t have the time now
All we know, we need to make the best of it
An opportunity like these doesn’t come that often
It was too good to pass it up
Life couldn’t get any better than this
Couldn’t it?

Hypocrite Mother

1990-12-28T01:18:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

From a sweet loving mother to something completely opposite
Where did the relationship go?
Perhaps, to hell
I didn’t change at all
I am the same son I always was
I didn’t ask to be gay
It just happen
I have no control over the gayness
Yes, I called her a hypocrite
Why?
Well, it is easy to answer
In my youth, we had a lesbian couple living across the street from us
Of course, we became good friends with them
We became family too
They had kids with the same age like us
We hang out a lot
We were even there for them when one of them ended up in the hospital
Her lover’s ex husband hit her with the car
They moved away to another part of town
We tried to stay in contact with them
We lost contact; they moved so many times
Years later, I finally come out of the closet
She didn’t love me as much any more
I knew it would happen.
So, I did the next best thing for me
I moved away without telling my family
Why should I tell them?
I was the black sheep
I didn’t get the same love like my sibs did
There is one thing I don’t understand
How come it is okay to have gay friends, not a gay son?
She didn’t had a problem with them being lesbians
Why me?
Hypocrite mother

My Mother

1990-12-27T01:18:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My mother
It is hard to explain our relationship
It could be good or bad
She does have other children by my father
BUT, I was quite different from the rest
I knew I was gay since I was a small kid
I haven’t tell her till I became an adult
Our relationship changed overnight
She tried to change me into a straight man
Not by setting up dates with women
She tended to push me away or control my life
If I don’t have a women’s love, I may seek out a women
Nah, it didn’t happen that way
I am still gay
My happiness comes first
I wouldn’t give up my gay life
It means the world to me
To this day, we hardly talk to each other
We were no longer in the same state
No family would come in between of my happiness and me
We lost contact with each other years ago
That really sums up my relationship with my mother

My Father

1990-12-26T01:10:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

My father
What can I say?
I hardly knew that man
He died thirty years ago in May 1973
There was a big hole in my life
I could say my childhood was terrible
Not everyone have both parents
Some aren’t that lucky - divorce
It was meant to be
Some good came out of his death
My mother didn’t know that she was pregnant
She had a baby girl on New Year’s Day
It was truly a new beginning for us
The baby was a blessing
We have something to remember my father
Life or death can change someone’s life
God works in mysterious ways
My father

The Cock

1990-12-25T01:13:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

The cock
He looked at the clock
It wasn’t time yet
In his mind, he was set
The morning sun was a clue
The sky became blue
It was time to wake up everyone
Far and near, it could be anyone
He was the hens’ favorite heartthrob
He loves his job

Fullfilled Dance

1990-12-24T01:12:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I can’t believe it
Dancing is my favorite
Another day came upon me
I heard the harmony
I have another chance
I would enjoy the day with a dance
I danced the day away
It couldn’t be any other way

Arching For Yesterday

1990-12-23T01:11:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Today
I missed yesterday
All day long, we kissed
So long, yesterday
Another day was today
I can’t wait for the kisses
I was such in bliss
Without her, I would be in a hiss
But there is always tomorrow
I could wait a little while longer
I must be patience
Her lips aren’t going anywhere
I would wait somewhere

Love From A Friend

1990-12-22T01:10:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

There was a phone call
I rushed to the mall
I pushed myself to the front
I heard a grunt
I was so sure
I need to be cure
A lonely heart I had
I was sad
I had enough
Being sad was rough
I want it to end
“I love you” came from a friend
I rushed home from the mall
I was happy I made the phone call

Nat

1990-12-21T01:11:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

She wanted to chat
I declined; she was fat
She picked up a bat
Drat!
Oh no, I would be flat
She killed a rat
She saved me; we chatted

Claire

1990-12-20T01:08:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

She had a little prayer
She don’t want the nightmare
She was forever on welfare
In awe, she became a millionaire
Her life was spare

The Frog

1990-12-19T01:05:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

The frog
He stood up in the fog
He chased a dog
He defended his homey log

Hollywood

1990-12-18T01:05:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Hollywood
There I stood
It was my dream since my childhood
I looked around the hood
It was fabulous good
I moved to Hollywood

Deadly Pact

1990-12-17T01:02:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I made a pact
It was such an impact
I saw his wicked charm
There were marks on the arm
He was a champ
I was a tramp
I collapsed
From the drugs, I relapsed

The Fire Will

1990-12-16T00:58:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

The house was in a blaze
It left me in a haze
The fire was out of control
It took the spirit out of my soul
I lost my spouse
I couldn’t afford another house
She was my life
She was the best wife
I read her will
She left me a new house on the hill

The Mouse

1990-12-15T00:39:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

The Mouse
He couldn’t get along with his spouse
Sometimes, she threw him out of the house
He partied too much at the clubhouse
It was a madhouse
Even his bird friends wouldn’t let him to stay in the birdhouse
The only place he could stay was the doghouse
It was no penthouse
He sobered up fast; he didn’t want to go to the jailhouse
He worked it out with the spouse
No more partying for the mouse

Do You Dare?

1990-12-14T00:39:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Do you dare to continue reading this daring poem?
Do you dare to come out of the closet?
Do you dare to watch my teary eyes?
Do you dare to listen to my sorrows?
Do you dare to hear my heart breaking for true love?
Do you dare to love me for whom I am?
Do you dare to be there whenever?
Do you dare to face whatever life offers the both of us?
Do you dare to enjoy my company?
Do you dare to sleep with me in the same bed?
Do you dare to share your thoughts and dreams with me?
Do you dare to walk the highest mountain and the lowest valley for me?
Do you dare to overcome our toughest challenges together?
Do you dare to take care of me?
Do you dare to dream of loving me?
Do you dare to meet my family?
Do you dare to go on trips?
Do you dare to take a bullet for me?
Do you dare to remain friends after we broke up?
Do you dare to have only eyes for yours truly?
Do you dare to show me the entire world?
Do you dare to kiss and make up?
Do you dare to leave our dirty laundry at the door?
Do you dare to support me?
Do you dare to wonder about my feelings for you?
Do you dare to know my true feelings from me?
Do you dare to accept my love to you?
Do you dare to get what I want from this poetic art?

Isn't Love Daring?

1990-12-13T00:38:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Sometimes, we need to question love.
Didn't it really happen?
Or was it a dream?
Some people want to scream
They want to wake up from the nightmare
Into their eyes, they stared
They wondered what happened
Was love worth all the pain in the world?
We can't seem to be there yet.
We traveled so many miles for love
Still, we haven't been able to find the right one
We searched high and low
Till the moment we find love, we are on cloud nine
We don't want to end the sweet loving
Things happens
We drifted apart
Where did we went wrong?
Who was to blame?
Did we act too fast for love?
Loves does takes time
Question love is such a crime
Isn't love daring?

Another Choice

1990-12-12T00:36:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I convinced him to put the knife down
His stupidity made me to frown
He has never act that way before
His tears fell to the floor
I closed the door
He wanted me to see things from his side
From all his troubles, he wanted to hide
Lately, he thought about suicide
He ought to know - Crime doesn’t pay
“What brought it up?” I asked
The demonic past finally caught up with him
He fought to live a good life
He failed miserable from his wicked past
The good life didn’t last
I felt sorry for him
He remembered the good times as kids
We made a fabulous Bonnie & Clyde
We terrorized the neighborhood for kicks
Now, he has nothing to show
He just wanted to be that kid again
With me at his side
Life was simple back then

Choice

1990-12-11T00:38:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I let it known through my powerful voice
I refused to be a part of his scheme
Robbing a bank was my friend’s dream
He thought we was a team
Hmm, not for the extreme!
He abused out friendship once too often
We robbed stores/people as young kids
I outgrown the childish games - Bonnie & Clyde
He accused me of being a hypocrite
Excuse me?
I didn’t want to do anything with it
He threw a big hissy fit
I got to admit
For himself, he wanted all that green
He was so hateful mean
A fabulous ideal popped into his head
He could split the bread
No thanks; I wouldn’t be caught dead
That money wasn’t ours to begin with
I earned a good living unlike him
I wouldn’t dare to mess up my life
He threatened me with a knife
He forced me to make another choice

Life Sucks

1990-12-10T00:38:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I hadn’t any such luck
I felt like I was run over by a truck
I couldn’t move any further; I was stuck
I was down for the count
The hell I went though, I deserved a discount
Instead, $500,000 was a pretty good amount
I hate being poor
Life is unsure
Please send me on a detour
I want to escape the hell
I wasn’t that well
My life smells
I shouted out loud
I wasn’t that proud
So badly, I want to be on cloud nine
Let me see a sign
Then everything would be fine
All the happiness in the world could be mine
I was tempted to do a line of coke
Why not? I was already flat broke
I didn’t get this cruelly joke
Life sucks

Fate

1990-12-09T00:28:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I stumbled out of the gate
Life wasn’t that great
I fell flat on my face
I wasn’t going to win the race
I need to act fast
I don’t want to be last
Life is a bitch
I wished I was a witch
I would cast a spell
Life wouldn’t be hell
I lived in the hood
It wasn’t that good
I run down the block
Time just stood there with the clock
I found a dime
Money was time
Both add up
I put it in the money cup

The Zone

1990-12-08T00:28:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I wasn’t alone
I was getting stoned
I loved this place
I saw many beautiful faces
I want to get them in the sack
Condoms or bareback
I didn’t care
If I get it, I wasn’t scare
I want the same thing no matter what the cost
In the naked sea, I wasn’t lost
I could last all night
I was as high as a kite
The men was a deliciously sight
It felt so right
They shared their drugs
I got much more than hugs
The drugs clouded my mind
My good sense was left behind
Sex & drugs was my guide
I didn’t want to hide in the zone

Counting The Days

1990-12-07T00:27:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I had a week left to find a place
I couldn’t look at my face
All I saw was a grim future
This time, things were different
I faced really living on the street
They won’t extend my stay at the shelter
I won’t go to another shelter either
I don’t like being homeless again
I had the same feelings six months ago
It crushed my being
Someone stomped on my soul
My mind was ready to take a hike with Anne Heche
It could be my only way out of the situation
It should bring structure in my life
It would brighten up my future
I looked everywhere for a place
I couldn’t afford the apartments
I could do so much with SSI
What would I do?
Crying won’t do any good
I tried that; I ended up being homeless
In the process, I was losing my mind and soul

Frying Pan

1990-12-06T00:27:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I didn’t have a sure fire plan
I truly felt the heat
I lay there like a piece of meat
They turned me over
I burned to a crisp
I couldn’t be all that bright
I shouldn’t put up a fight
I wouldn’t wait for the white knight
It was too late to save me from the fire
The flames became higher each time
I tried to escape
I kept on getting burn
I wept that life was going up in smoke
It got extremely hot
The sun gave it the best shot
It boils down to this conclusion
Living on earth is a frying pan

Short Visit

1990-12-05T00:28:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I went to Dallas
I thought my friend could help
Boy, I was wrong
She mentioned that living in Texas is where I belonged
What the heck!
My sadness was up to my neck
Life was a total wreck
I claimed I wasn’t happy
She proclaimed it was a part of God’s plans
I explained my happiness comes first
She mentioned I must do his plan
I came to a realization
She won’t help me at all
I wasted valuable time
She figured she could sweet talk of me staying
It wasn’t a part of my plan
She offered to pick me up for church every Sunday
I didn’t fell for her deal
After church, she took me straight home
We said “goodbyes” and “see me this Sunday.”
Hell, no - she was a big let down
My mind was made up - I was going back to Hollywood.

Unhappy Home

1990-12-04T00:22:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I hated living here
I can’t wait to move back to Hollywood, dear
I don’t want to live in Texas for a year
With my feelings, I was being sincere
There wasn’t anything for me, much less a career
The apartment was a one-year lease
Moving to Hollywood was my peace
I tried to talk with the mother
She wouldn’t listen, oh brother
I lived in the middle of nowhere
I couldn’t go somewhere
I want to go anywhere
How could I?
I was far from everything
I couldn’t do something
I want to do anything
The bus lines was many miles from my place
I was stuck at home, doing nothing
It was freaking boring
I couldn’t stand it
I wouldn’t be happy
I shouldn’t live in an unhappy home

The Other Man

1990-12-03T00:18:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I met this attraction lonely lady
She was frustrated with her hubby’s love
He spent many hours at work
He hardly notice her ant more
She felt like their love was dying
He couldn’t respond to her attraction and love
She was desperate to be in my arms
She loves my smile and charm
I reminded her of his younger self
At first, she fought the attraction
She thought long and hard about it
She sought to have this little affair
It taught her that she couldn’t resist me
The attraction was so strong
She didn’t feel guilty about cheating
Her passion for her husband vanished
I replaced him in her heart
She was happier and more alive
I was a fresh of breath air
She could love the other man

Lonely Wife

1990-12-02T00:18:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I had the wandered eyes
You didn’t have time for me
You was too busy for work
You worked long hours
I felt lonely and frustrated
Some nights, you didn’t eat your meal
You claimed you wasn’t that hungry
You went straight to bed after work
What do you expect me to do?
I wasn’t getting enough loving
I still love you thou
I love you even more now
You go away on long business trips
I want to kiss you on the lips
You turned away from me
It burned me that work gets in the way
Our love took a nosedive
The other men made me so alive
Another lonely moment, I couldn’t survive

Why, Dear?

1990-12-01T00:18:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Why, dear?
Love doesn’t suppose to be like that
I gave you all my life
I was a good husband
I thought I could trust you
I brought anything you wanted
I sought your affair from afar
I wasn’t that blind
Your eyes didn’t connect to mine
The affair wasn’t that fine
I wondered how long it went on
Then again, I didn’t care
So badly, I wanted to swear
I cursed you with all the lust you have
You deserved all the pain and suffering you gave me
I served you with divorce papers
I want you to be out of my life
You’re no longer my wife
You wanted to be someone’s whore
On our marriage, you closed the door
Why, dear?

Welcome Back, Steve

1990-11-30T00:12:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Welcome back, Steve
I gained an abusive boyfriend
My friend warned me about him
I didn’t listen to him
“That kind of relationship wasn’t love.”
I was madly in love
Sadly enough, my friend walked out of my life
My lover kept on hitting me
I wept that I did something wrong
I slept horrible
I still wanted his love
He filled our love into a sick love
He didn’t stop hitting me
I dropped him like a bad habit
I hopped on the bus to Dallas
I regained his friendship
Welcome Back, Steve

Invisible Love

1990-11-29T00:13:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Invisible love
I was infatuated for someone
I called him on the phone
He wanted none of my love
I was so alone without him
He hated being a clone
I saw him in a different light
He was too good looking to be straight
Why can’t I have him?
It drove me crazy
A white dove flew to me
I grabbed the note from the beak
I can be a geek sometimes
Love wasn’t there to begin with
It can’t be any different
I was gay and he was straight
Why chase after invisible love?

Broken Friendship

1990-11-28T00:13:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Broken Friendship
I went on a growing apart trip
I might not get off the ship
I ruined a good friendship
I gave him lip
I talked behind his back
He walked away from me for good
He balked at me how I treated him badly
A good friend, I cheated myself
Here was some food for thought
Friends are there through thick and thin
That golden rule I abused
I misused him for granted
He threw me out of his life
We grew apart, thanks to me
He may never be my friend again
Broken friendship

Safety Net

1990-11-27T00:06:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Safety Net
I set him in his place
His drinking met up with him again
Alcohol was his pet
I let him have it
I won’t choose between his drinking and him
It was no contest and a waste of time
My negative energy rest in peace
I was positive that his drinking wasn’t my problem
He felt safe drinking around me
I found it to be an excuse
He would continues to abuse his body
I should have done it the first time
It could save me from reliving the past
The past caught up in the present
It taught me a valuable lesion
I destroyed the safety net

True Love

1990-11-26T23:49:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

True Love
Nothing will come in between the two of us
We was really in love
I was so sure it cured me of the blues I had
It must be true love
I trusted everything will fall into it’s place
Something I will never regret
The everlasting love never dies
It kept us in a strong bond
Even the wolf in sheep’s clothing can’t tear us apart
I saw it so clearly
True love had never hit me so hard before
You gave me love to cherish with all my heart
I saved myself for u, the love of my life
Other men tempted me
Sure, another man may catch my eye
I would have been a prey
I couldn’t let myself through that
God set me on a trail for true love
I get wet all inside
I was mushy for someone to live
I was so fond of you
I gave you all my love
I lived with Mr. Right
We had a bright future to live for
Nothing will come in between the two of us
True love

A Paycheck

1990-11-25T00:03:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

A paycheck was my way to earn money for a living
I forsaken my boring job
I ended up living on the street
It sent me looking for another job
I won’t waste time on the street
I kept on looking till I find something
I wept when someone offered me a job
I was going to survive in this world
I grew into a responsible person
I glow bright as the North Star
The right amount put me on the right track
I got a life I always wanted
I gained a loving wife and three wonderful kids
I praised God for giving me everything
I lived in my dream house in Dallas
I steamed ahead to a better future
A future where nothing could destroy my happiness
Something got to give for God
I donated lots of money to charity
Nothing can rain on my parade, plain as simple

The Prom

1990-11-24T23:59:00.000-08:00

by Kazz Falcon

I set my sights on the crown
It's rightfully mine to begin with
I was living proof that I am the queen
It gave me a good shot
This queen wasn't greedy
I wanted to please my every need
I ceased the opportunity
I ran for Miss Queen at my school
My gay friends thought it was cool
We finally had a real queen to root for
Some people don't give a hoot
I came in living color
I walked on the stage
They stared at me
I heard the whispers, "Beware of the flamboyant queen."
The crown was too important for my gay friends and I
Down on the floor, some peeps ran out of the door
I gave everything I got
I performed RuPaul's hit, "Supermodel Of The World"
They were having the time of their lifes
They yelled "We want a real queen, not some cheap imitation!"
I felt so good inside
Everyone danced their asses off
They announced the King and the Queen
The real queen was here
No one could steal my moment
The first time in my life, I was on top of the world
I was popular as never before
I was ever so gay
It made my night
I wouldn't trade it for the world
"Long live the queen!" they chanted
This queen belongs with the crown

Pitch Black

1990-11-23T23:54:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

I opened my eyes
I can’t see anything
Darkness was all around me
I got out of bed
I tried to turn on the light
Damn, the lamp doesn’t work
I walked through the darkness
I stumbled to the floor
I hurt my knee slightly
I still couldn’t see anything
I feared for the worst
I hope it wasn’t true
I can’t go blind, I just can’t
I can’t lose my sight
I crawled back to bed
I looked at the clock
Damn, the batteries wasn’t working either
Then again, I may be going blind
I can’t see anything at all
I turned on the TV, nothing happened
It dawned on me
The storm knocked out the power

Feeling Good

1990-11-22T23:47:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon
Dedicated to Gary Gonzales

My sweet dear friend wrote me a poem

“You are for all to admire
Truly everyone’s hearts desire
Your giving and kindness was something odd
Your sharing and caring was a gift from God
Please be happy and don’t focus on gay
Think good thoughts, good things will come your way”

It was good to be known like that
It was even better being famous
My closest friends was a part of that
I was moved so much that tears came from my heart
He was like a father to me
He gave me everything in the whole world
He made my world much better to enjoy life
He was a good friend indeed
The closest thing to family was my friends
They gave you all the support, love and understanding
It filled the void in my heart
I hadn’t seen my family in ages
Two families was better than one
Gary’s poem made me feeling good about life
I rushed out to shared it with friends
The impression on their faces made his poem extra special
It will forever remain in my heart
A motherly friend cried in joy and sorrow
We would miss him deeply when he dies
His poem was our treasure to cherish
Good friends never died
They stayed in our hearts to keep in touch with our memories
Feeling good made us share the best things in life with friends
And the poem Gary wrote was one of them

Life Is…

1990-11-21T23:47:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Life is
Happiness and sadness
Life is
Positive and negative
Life is
Being alive and death
Life is
A baby and a grown up
Life is
Being careful and living dangerous
Life is
Choices and mistakes
Life is
Love and lust
Life is
Friends and enemies
Life is
War and peace
Life is
Young and old
Life is
Hurtful and healing
Life is
Strong and weak
Life is
The truth and lies
Life is
Wealthy and poor
Life is
Good and bad
Life is
Eating and starving
Life is
Laughing and crying
Life is
What you make the most out of it

Earth Always Endures

1990-11-20T23:47:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

Earth Always Endures
Not quite like hell
Life is one big fire burning
Souls are being lost
That’s why we need Jesus Christ
Heaven on earth is more like it
Earth always endures

The Dragon

1990-11-19T23:36:00.000-08:00

By Kazz Falcon

The dragon
He was once of the fierce creatures I ever love
He was friendly at first
His kindness captured my heart
We became lovers
I wondered if I was insane back then
Could fast love works?
The black cloud came forth
I was trapped in a troublesome relationship
His drinking increased gotten out of control
I had no place to escape
He never did hit me or be violent with me
My only peace was on the web
I wanted so much to be a spider
The web was a safety net
He was in a car accident and lost everything
We went our separate ways
But our love dreadfully stayed intact
The dragon